This chapter focuses on relationship compatibility, compatible matches, and compatibility matching, three distinct but inter-related topics
In the first section of this article, I discuss how relationship compatibility is presented in relationship science. The second section focuses more specifically on compatible matches, also from the perspective of relationship science. The final section discusses the compatibility matching procedures used at the Internet matching sites. Although the focus of Internet matching services is on compatibility in romantic relationships, compatibility is a concept relevant to all types of relationships, including friendships, parent-child relationships, and co-workerspatibility is also a relationship state that is good and desirable (Berscheid, 1985; Berscheid & Regan, 2005).
Regardless of whether compatibility is assessed directly or is assessed indirectly through its traveling companions, different observers and actors may vary in their perceptions of a relationship’s compatibility. For example, research by Chris Agnew and his colleagues suggests that social networks’ opinions of the compatibility of relationships may be more realistic, predictive, and negative than that of the insiders (Agnew, Loving, & Drigotas, 2001; Etcheverry, Le, & Charania, 2008; Loving, 2006; MacDonald & Ross, 1999).
The second category of causal conditions is the combination or intersection of P’s and O’s characteristics (including their personality characteristics, attitudes and values, interests), which can refer specifically to being a compatible match. This causal factor is a focus on static personal characteristics of both partners and represents the crux of what is being considered by Internet matching sites in their efforts to create matches based on relationship science. The three “principles” from the close relationships field that refer to the intersection of partners’ characteristics are: (1) similarity (or “birds of a feather flock together”), (2) complementary (or “opposites attract”); and 3) matching on socially desirable characteristics. (more…)